A Different Side to Hostels

Recently, I haven’t had the most enjoyable experiences at hostels. And it sucks because I really love the idea of “social living.” From different living styles to languages & cultural traditions. Hopefully it’s only a phase of shitty luck. Because socializing feels different now. Like an obligation to have sex with a different culture.

My interest in in your culture, no. My attempt at speaking your language, no. My smile when learning of your traditions, no. My laughter when something is funny, no. NO, it is not me expressing a desire to have sex with you.

Ugh, It’s been happening so much. I feel like a sexual object. From a moment of weak choosing to wallow in this shitty feeling, I picked myself up. Because this isn’t okay. Experiencing culture is not synonymous with tasting you or whatever you may say.

A man told me, “I knew you wanted me when you said your name.” HOLD UP. WHAT.  Is this serious? So now, just introducing myself is an invitation?

In one hostel, I didn’t even put my bag on the ground before asked if a “beautiful girl like me could possibly have a boyfriend. I want to have drinks with you.” Shoutout to this man for saying he’d update my bedroom to make me more comfortable but that he’d do it “just for me.” To a private room. Winky Face. I’ d assume this is where the return favor would happen. Quite disgusted.

And before that. A man launching me around his waist. Telling him “No,” must have sounded funny?  As his grip felt tighter while crossing into our dorm, he plopped on an empty bottom bunk. Not okay. Removing myself, I headed toward my bunk ladder.  Behind me, “SO can you dance salsa.” Whiplash…again. He laughed. & I forced myself on my bed. If I want to fuck you, I won’t move my face in the opposite direction of where you kiss. SO, buddy, take the hint. #NotInterested.

As my first solo trip,  I was nervous & had all these expectations of hostel life. Good & bad. At first, each hostel experience was incredible, I had to stop extending so much. These were the hostels where I enjoyed socializing.

Then, at some point socializing became hook-up chatter. I went from chatting in the common areas with other travelers to leaving for cafes at 7am & returning super late to avoid all of it. The expectation to hook-up, to any extent, with the man I talked to the most. And it sucks because that’s not me. I’m the social one.

These kinds of hostel experiences really made me rethink the safety of the whole concept. You’re sleeping next to all these different people, some who may come from a culture where women are inferior to men/ seen as sexual objects. So make sure you’re careful.

Share below how you feel about hostels! And remember to follow the adventures.

Chat soon XO

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